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Applying Innovative Process: Divorce Mediation

Most separating couples harbor questions, fears, insecurities and anger and all are intertwined. Add friends and relative who shovel fuel on the fire ("you should take him/her for all she has") and others who give erroneous advice on what should happen and it is no wonder clients spend large fees on lawyers to sooth their fueled sense of entitlement. Most businesses that act like that, making decisions based on emotions rather than objective, fail to survive.  Divorce Mediation is a beneficial and powerful process to resolve divorce issues, even for high conflict parties.

Couples seeking divorce need to be innovative to create individually designed solutions to the reality of trying to successfully separate as a couple with shared children and a financial house, with assets, real estate, retirements accounts and debts) similar to a business partnership. Innovation leads to better solutions and positive results. But innovation isn't the role of the Courts. And it is not easy.

An Illinois strategy company, Cloverleaf Innovation, describes a process it has trademarked at the "LEAF Innovation Process". Its cornerstones are parallel to the underlying concepts of the divorce mediation process.

* Look/Listen/Learn

* Envision

* Activate

* Forward

Mediation puts two people in one room with a trained neutral. Each party should look, listen and learn from the other party who describes his or her perceptions, aspirations and needs. This is often the most important aspect, allowing the parties a safe place to tell their story and what they need for the future.

Then, the parties try to envision the best situation for themselves and the children and the best way to divide the assets and debts so that both parties can move forward. Various options are discussed; some ideas and concepts may be "outside the box" to stimulate as many options as possible. By envisioning and speaking / listening / learning the positive and negative attributes of potential solutions, parties can begin to visualize their solutions.

Then, the mediation process maps out a plan to activate the agreed upon solution. Once the solution is activated, both parties move forward with their plan. Divorce need not be an exercise of assured mutual destruction, included financial destruction caused by high litigation expenses. A mediated divorce is usually less costly that a divorce conflict and leads to personalized solutions based on achieving positive results during a difficult period.

Let Steven Hirsch, an experienced divorce mediator help you through the process.

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Law Office of Steven J. Hirsch, Esq

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